My Toddler Hates Brushing – Any Tips?

 

If you’re reading this, chances are you’ve had at least one battle over the toothbrush with your toddler. Maybe it ends in screaming, tears, or your child clamping their mouth shut like a vault. Trust me—you’re not alone. As a parent, you want to set your child up for a lifetime of healthy habits, but brushing can feel like an uphill battle.

Let’s break down why toddlers resist brushing and, more importantly, what you can do to make it easier (and maybe even fun!).

Why Toddlers Resist Brushing

Before diving into solutions, it helps to understand why your toddler might be brushing-resistant. Here are a few common reasons:

• They want control. Toddlers are learning independence. Having something “done” to them (like brushing) can trigger resistance.
• Sensory issues. The feeling of bristles, toothpaste texture, or taste can be overwhelming for some kids.
• They’re not in the mood. Toddlers live in the moment. If brushing interrupts a game or their favorite show, they’re going to protest.
• They don’t see the point. Oral hygiene isn’t exactly thrilling for a toddler. To them, it’s just another boring grown-up rule.

Now that we know what we’re dealing with, let’s talk strategies.

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1. Let Them Choose Their Toothbrush and Toothpaste

Giving your child a say in the tools can go a long way. Bring them along to pick out a toothbrush with their favorite character or color. There are even toddler-safe electric toothbrushes with lights and music that make the process more fun.

Also, try a few flavors of toddler-safe toothpaste. Some kids hate mint and prefer fruitier options. Giving them ownership over their dental tools can spark curiosity and willingness.

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2. Make It a Game

Turn brushing into a game, and your toddler may actually look forward to it. Some ideas:

• Brush to a song. Use a two-minute brushing song (lots are available on YouTube or Spotify) and make it a dance party in the bathroom.
• Use a brushing app. Apps like Brush DJ, Disney Magic Timer, or Chompers use music, timers, and characters to guide the brushing routine.
• Pretend play. Let them brush their stuffed animal’s teeth first, then say it’s their turn. You can also pretend to be a dentist and “inspect” their teeth after brushing.

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3. Brush Together

Toddlers love to imitate. Brushing your teeth alongside them shows that it’s a normal part of everyday life. You can even turn it into a silly face contest in the mirror while brushing. Watching you do it makes them more likely to join in without a fight.

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4. Give Them Control (Sort Of)

Instead of holding them down or doing all the brushing yourself, let them try it first. Say something like, “You brush first, then it’s my turn to finish up!” That way, they feel involved and not overpowered.

You can also offer limited choices like:

• “Do you want to brush before or after your bath?”
• “Should we brush with the blue or the green toothbrush tonight?”

These small choices give your toddler a sense of control without compromising the goal.

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5. Use Positive Reinforcement

Toddlers respond well to praise and encouragement. Celebrate brushing like it’s a big deal:

• “Wow! You did such a great job brushing your teeth!”
• “Your teeth are so shiny now—great work!”

Some families use sticker charts or small non-food rewards after a full week of brushing. Keep it simple and age-appropriate.

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6. Stay Calm and Consistent

Even on the days when they resist with all their might, try not to turn brushing into a power struggle. Calmly explain that brushing teeth is part of the routine—just like getting dressed or going to bed. Toddlers thrive on routine, even if they don’t always show it.

If the meltdown starts, try a reset: give them a few minutes, try a different location (like brushing in the living room with a mirror), or use distraction tactics like a funny voice or brushing with their favorite toy “watching.”

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7. Try Brushing in Different Places

Who says brushing has to be done in the bathroom? Toddlers often respond better to novelty. Let them brush in front of a bedroom mirror, while sitting on the couch, or even outside on the porch. As long as the teeth get clean, it counts.

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8. Show Them the “Why”

Books and videos about tooth brushing can help toddlers understand why it’s important. Some fun options:

• Brush, Brush, Brush! by Alicia Padron
• Daniel Goes to the Dentist (Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood)
• The Tooth Book by Dr. Seuss

Seeing their favorite characters brushing can make a big difference.

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9. Tag-Team with Another Adult

If possible, trade off with your partner or another trusted adult. Some toddlers push boundaries with one parent but respond differently to another. Switching it up occasionally can relieve stress for everyone.

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10. Talk to Your Pediatric Dentist

If brushing is a daily war despite your best efforts, talk to your child’s dentist. They may recommend brushing techniques, special products, or identify if there’s a sensory sensitivity issue at play. Sometimes, just hearing advice from the “tooth doctor” can help toddlers take it more seriously.

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Final Thoughts

Brushing with a toddler isn’t always easy—and that’s okay. The key is to keep trying, stay positive, and make the routine as playful and predictable as possible. With time (and a little creativity), your toddler will likely come around.

And remember: this phase won’t last forever. You’re doing great.

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